Until Death
by Vampiregirl811
Summary: Tonks needs to explain to Remus that she loves him. She doesn't care about what he calls his "flaws." But when traumatic events keep happening on what he beleives is his fault, how can he risk the life of the only girl he loves? Can he take the risk?
1. Chapter 1

**This is going to be a longie I think. Well I know. I basically have the while story written in another 25 page word document. This is only a section of it. Well duh. Anyway.**

**Hope you like. 5 reviews for an update. Flame me if you must, but warning I will probably laugh at it. :)**

**Chapter one**

Tonks lay lazily on her bed while playing with her iPhone. To her, Muggle contraptions were just as fun as any other magical item. She had one earphone in her ear and was listening to some of her favorite American bands and singers as she scrolled through sites and blogs on the internet.

Harry was in the middle of his fifth year, and Sirius was stuck here bored to death. So, Tonks decided to be the nice Hufflepuff inside of her and keep him company, but also like the Hufflepuff inside of her, she liked playing and doing fun stuff outside. Unfortunately, Sirius couldn't afford to step more than 10 feet off the property in the backyard.

So here she was, in an empty room, alone for the moment, playing with her iPhone, completely and utterly bored. She groaned out loud, shut off her phone, placed it in her pocket, and trotted down the stairs to hang out with Sirius. Just as she was half way down the stairs, she tripped over the wooden crack that always (and only) seemed to snatch her while running down the stairs. Luckily, Sirius was there to catch her before she started tumbling down the stairs.

"I wonder how you ever are able to live alone," He chuckled and helped her down the rest of the stairs.

"Ha, ha, ha," She laughed humorlessly, "But I think I'll stay here. Unless, you want to live here alone?"

Sirius sneered playfully, making Tonks giggle.

"Speaking of living," Sirius started as they walked into the dreadful and solemn looking kitchen, "Remus is coming to stay for a little while. Think you can control your womanly hormones?"

Tonks snorted and plopped herself on a chair, "There is a difference between a crush and pure lust, Sirius. Besides," She grabbed a bottle of water that was on the table and took a sip before she said, "It's not like he's head over heels for me,"

"Yet!" Sirius said with such enthusiasm, he plopped the orange juice container onto the counter loudly, making the bottom start leaking orange juice.

Tonks giggled again, and with a wave of her wand, mended the container.

"And what exactly do you have planned dear cousin?" Even though they weren't technically cousins, they often referred to themselves as such.

"Oh, you'll see," Sirius winked then downed a glass of orange juice, "I've been bored to tears, as you well know, and now I have a couple of love birds to play with." He wiggled his eyebrows, making Tonks roll her eyes.

"Sirius he doesn't like me. He doesn't want to be with me, you know that," Tonks then got immediately sad. Sirius, being the sweet, caring man that he is (But it can be buried deep down sometimes) went over to Tonk's side and rubbed her hand.

"You don't know that," He whispered, "He really does like you, honey. But think about if the situation was reversed. If you were a werewolf, more than ten years older, and not enough money to sustain a family, would you really want to be with someone? Or at least make them feel what you feel?"

Sirius was never a deep person, but when he was…well normally he wasn't. This was a once in a life time opportunity, and because of that Tonks knew he wasn't bluffing.

"That's just the thing—if it were me than I would have thought the same thing. But what can I do to prove to him that…?" She broke off.

"That _what_?" He said in a very teenage girl O-M-G kind of look. His serious expression turned to a smug one as he said, "You _really_ like him don't you,"

"No point in denying it I guess," She mumbled and shrugged.

"I mean really, _really_ like him,"

"Yes I got that part, Sirius,"

"No, I mean—"

"Oh bloody Hell, Sirius! I'm in love with the man!" Tonks exclaimed, and just then her hair turned bright red with that rush of anger and annoyance.

Sirius's eyes widened, and he didn't really calm down until her hair turned back to her normal, light brown hair. It had changed from her natural pink color to brown since her feelings about Remus changed dramatically.

"Why don't you tell him that?" Sirius whispered.

Tonks couldn't help but laugh, "You don't think I tried, before? If he obviously doesn't want me then fine. I'm not saying I'm over him, I'm saying that I won't hound him constantly about marriage and children and all that crap. If he doesn't want me then… then fine,"

"But he does!" Sirius insisted.

Tonks laughed again, "He hasn't said that ever yet. All he's ever said was 'I'm too old," or 'too poor' or 'a bloody werewolf,' or crap like that," Tonks shook her head, "The way he puts it makes me think that he's just trying to get a hormonal, crazed, and love-struck teenage girl off his back. If you don't mind,"

Tonks stood up, pushed the chair into the table, and then walked calmly upstairs until she knew Sirius wouldn't hear or notice her quiet sobs from her room, muffled by her fluffy white pillow.

Sirius stood where he was, staring at the place where Tonks was sitting a few moments ago. He never really knew she liked him… or rather _loved_ Remus.

Sirius had known Remus for a long time, but never had Sirius seen a girl show this much love and affection toward Remus. He then wondered why in the Hell Remus didn't want to be with her.

She was perfect for him! She loved him, she could be there for him, and the fact that he was a bloody werewolf didn't waver her feelings toward him in the slightest! Sirius was going to have to do something major. Or at least something fast before a war broke out and…well… before anything happened that could prevent them from ever being together.

Sirius shook at the thought of one of his friends dying. He couldn't live without any of them, even Ron or Hermione. He loved them all. With this thought in mind, he vowed to get Remus and Tonks together if it was the last thing he would ever do.

Little did he know…

Tonks woke the next morning with tear stains down her eyes, and a particularly suspicious patch of salty water on her pillow. Then memories of what happened flowed back into her mind as if someone was retelling the story.

She groaned and flipped on her stomach to check the time. 5:38. She groaned, rolled off the bed with a light thud, picked herself up, and then headed down the stairs to get something to eat. She didn't want to come down for dinner, and didn't even let Kreacher in to give her any food.

She side-stepped the crack in the floor, and made it down the steps without waking Sirius (She could hear him snoring down the hall). She tip toed into the kitchen, and opened the fridge. She squinted at the brightness of it, and pulled out a cheese stick and some orange juice.

Opening a cabinet that was closest to her, she picked out a small mug and poured herself a generous amount of orange juice before shutting the fridge and eventually finding the light switch and flipped them on.

She sat herself down at the table, unwrapped her cheese stick, and pulled her phone out of her pocket. She scrolled through her apps mindlessly, thinking of only one person. The one person that caused her so much pain and wanting that it almost drove her mad.

She hated the feeling, actually. This…this need. She didn't want to seem like some fan-girl who just wanted to hop in someone's pants. She really cared for Remus. She wanted…she snorted to herself before finishing the thought.

Why fantasize a life with him if he obviously doesn't want it? Before she could think of anything else, she heard a soft voice come from behind her.

"I didn't know you woke this early, Dora,"

Tonks practically jumped out of her chair. Actually, her reaction in slow motion was a) jumping a foot in the air, b) falling out of her chair , c) scrambling up to the floor and yelling, "Expelliarmus!"

Immediately, the stranger's wand flew out of his pocket and into the air where Tonks grabbed it and in a single motion stuck it in her back pocket and pointed her own wand and the intruder's throat.

Then she saw the person (a man)'s stunned, and slightly amused face.

"Oh my God, Remus!" Tonks gasped, "You scared the crap out of me,"

"I can see that, dear," Remus laughed lightly and reached around her to grab his wand back, "Nice reflexes by the way,"

"Thanks," She replied, then her eyes narrowed, "When did you get here?"

"Around an hour ago. Full moon just ended a few days ago, and I decided to come a bit early instead of trying to find a place at this time,"

"Yeah, yeah, of course," Tonks said, feeling bad he had to mention the whole "werewolf" thing. Not that it bothered her.

"What going on!" yelled Sirius. He was in a long grey tee shirt that covered past his knees and baggy pants. His wand was pointing past the two of us, over by the wall. He looked extremely tired, hence the bags under his eyes that Tonks just noticed.

"Remus! What in the bloody name in Hell are you doing here?"

"I came a bit early. I accidently frightened Dora, and she attacked me,"

"Oh, did she now?" Asked Sirius, giving one of his 'omg girl!' kind of look.

"Watch yourself, Black," Tonks laughed and returned to her seat and munched on her cheese stick.

"Weeelllll," Sirius said and exaggerated a yawn, "I'm off to bed. You know it's only 5 in the morning. You two have fun now," he called as he trotted down the hall.

Tonks rolled her eyes and flipped her phone on.

"What is that?" Remus questioned. Tonks looked up to see Remus's head cocked to the side, looking at the object in Tonk's hands. He looked down-right adorable as he contemplated what was in her hand.

"Oh, this is an iPhone. It's a Muggle device. You can call people, play games, go on the internet…"

"Internet?"

Tonks laughed and with a dismissive wave of her hand said, "Another day. Here, try it,"

Remus sat in the chair and looked at the phone.

"It says, 'Swipe to unlock.'"

"Well swipe to unlock, genius," Tonks laughed.

"With what?" He questioned. His expression was priceless and Tonks couldn't help but giggle uncontrollably for a moment.

"With your finger. It's a touch screen,"

"Touch screen," He repeated, and violently jabbed his hand on the button and dragged it painstakingly slow across the screen. He set the phone down as the page turned into a different screen.

"Now it says to enter a…pass code,"

"It's 1357," I said.

"But now I know it!"

"I trust you won't tell anyone," Tonks laughed, "Go ahead. Tap the buttons."

Remus, again, violently tapped the four numbers, and his eyes widened when the screen changed to the home page.

"Wow!" He said and picked up the phone and looked at it from the front and the back, "This is ingenious!"

"And they do it without magic," Tonks said, "I hate it when people say Muggles are useless. Actually, I think they are better than us,"

"How so?" He asked, still looking completely mind blown about the whole touch screen.

"Think about it, Muggles have to do everything without magic. We have it easy. Plus, they came up with most of the things that we use daily,"

"Oh no!" He shouted and set the phone down, "I'm so sorry I think I broke it!"

It appeared that Remus pressed the Angry Birds App.

"No, you just pressed a game," Tonks turned the phone toward herself and pressed the home button. Remus pressed the home button as well, and then a small box popped up, and Remus read it out loud.

"International love. What is that?"

"It's a muggle song. One of my favorite rappers sings it,"

"What does a rapper do?" He inquired, but Tonks bet he spelled rapper "wrapper" in his head.

"Rappers…well… Here, listen to the song,"

Tonks pressed the play button, lowered the volume, and Pitbul and Chris Brown started doing they're thing.

"I'm going to warn you, it's a bit sketchy," Tonks couldn't wait for his reaction. She knew he was going to pay close attention to every lyric. She held a giggle back.

_Went from Mr. 305, Dade County, to Mr. Worldwide, all around the world  
>Now we're International, so international, international, so international,<em>

_You can't catch me, boy (can't catch me, boy)  
>I'm overseas and about a hundred G's per show<br>Don't test me, boy (Don't test me, boy)  
>Cause I rap with the best for sure,<br>305 till the death of me  
>Cremate my body and let the ocean have what's left of me<br>But for now, forget about that,  
>Blow the whistle<br>Baby you're the referee_

"How do you understand this?" Remus asked, but looked like he was slightly enjoying himself, "He's saying all of it so fast I can hardly understand,"

"It takes practice to understand him," Tonks laughed and they continued listening.__

_You put it down like New York City  
>I never sleep!<br>Wild like Los Angeles  
>My fantasy!<br>Hotter than Miami  
>I feel the heat!<br>Ohh, girl, it's International love  
>Ohh, it's International love<em>

They continued listening to the song, and luckily Remus couldn't understand all of the lyrics and the meanings because of the speed of Pitbull's rapping.

"Interesting," Remus said and set the contraption down. He yawned after a moment and said, "Well, I'm going to head over to the guess bedroom. Good night—well actually good _morning_, Dora,"

Tonks smiled after him as he walked away. She suppressed the urge to do a victory dance.


	2. Chapter 2

**I guess I wasn't too clear about this fic, my fault :). I may use songs and muggle equipment that is in current times. Nothing too drastic…or it might be to you. **

**Anyway I hope you like this next chapter and reviews please! I already have most of this fic already written, and if you guys want more just review please!**

_Good morning? Good morning! How much stupider can you get Remus?_ Remus thought to himself and slapped himself on the face on him way up the stairs, carrying his small but heavy suitcase.

After reaching the top of the stairs to stretch his worn arms, he heard a, "Reeeeemus,"

He turned on the spot to see Sirius giving him a very meaningful look with raised eyebrows.

Remus rolled his eyes and said, "Well hello, Sirius, how are you,"

"Well, I'm fine and dandy cooped up her doing nothing. How are you?"

"Well, I'm fine and dandy dealing with my post-transformation aches and pains,"

"Splendid," Sirius said, then after a moment, "Soooo, you and Tonks?"

"No. No, no, no, absolutely not," Remus said shaking his head and his arms.

"Remus!" Sirius began exasperatedly, "She loves you, man. Do you know what you do to her?"

"It doesn't matter. She—"

"'Doesn't matter'?" Sirius repeated, a bit angry this time, "Do you know the pain she is in everyday, trying to forget about you? Do you know how much she loves you? Do you know that all she ever wants to for you to love her back, and I know you do—Don't deny it!—so why don't you just... I don't know man," He broke off a bit and ran a hand through his hair, "You just can't leave her like this,"

"Do you not think I don't love her back?" Remus hissed at him, stepping closer, "Do you not think I don't think about her every single damn day and what my life would be like with her? Do you not realize how her life will be in jeopardy by being with me?"

"She doesn't care, Remus!" Sirius said grabbing his robes, as if trying to shake the sense into him, "All she wants is you. I've never seen her like this before, nor any girl fancying you as much as she,"

Remus was silent a moment before replying, "I do love her, and I would do anything to make her happy. But I can't. I just..,"

"Remus," Sirius started in a softer voice, "I love you, man. I love you and I love Tonks. I can't stand to see the both of you like this. No offense, but it's pretty obvious that you love the girl. So just go on a bloody date with her. Just try it out. You'll see that she really does love you. More than you know. I want you to be happy," Sirius searched Remus's eyes for any sign of a retort, and when he found none, he patted Remus on his shoulder, and turned around to go back to bed.

Remus stood there for a few minutes in thought. He eventually shook his head clear of thoughts, picked up his bag, and headed over to the room he usually occupied when he was staying over.

He unpacked his bag, but was mainly in deep thought. He wasn't lying before. He really did love her. He wanted to be with her—only her. But what could he do? He was a werewolf. Living with him would be as dangerous as living next door to a bunch of dementors (But then again, you live with a lot of chocolate). He through his suitcase under the bed and decided to head downstairs to discuss with Tonks. He didn't care that it was around…well now 6 in the morning.

By the time he tip toed down the stairs, the room was lit with small rays of sunlight. He quietly moved from room to room, where he eventually found Tonks sleeping on the couch by the room nearest the kitchen.

He moved a bit closer to Tonks, and for a few minutes was content with watching her sleep. How could such a beautiful, caring, loving girl love someone like him? Well… if she was caring and loving then that makes sense… but she deserved someone better. Someone younger, someone richer, someone who wasn't cursed and forced to leave for a week ever month. Just the thought made him sick of himself.

But whenever he was with her, talking with her, he forgot that he was older, poor, and a werewolf. Nothing mattered but her.

She stirred in her sleep, and her face was visible. She had a single tear streak down her face. He wondered what she was crying about. Just then, she rolled over off the couch, but Remus was there to catch her.

She gasped and woke up immediately, and luckily didn't attack him.

"Remus," She said, sounding somewhat sad, "I didn't know you were here. Thanks," She added. She looked away from him, and looked as if she was about to cry and smack him at the same time.

"Dora," He started cautiously.

"What?" She snapped, making him jump slightly, "What do you want? To come here, make me fall in love with you, then reject me as soon as I…" She broke off and huffed. He could tell she was trying to sound angry, but he knew she was hurt.

"No, Dora!" He said, moving slightly closer, "I…" He stopped. He didn't know what to say. Was he just supposed to ask her if she wanted to go to dinner? No. She's mad at him. What's he supposed to say now? _Oh think, Remus, think! _

Tonks blinked a few times, then got up and ran up the stairs. Remus ran a hand through his hair, and slowly followed her.

As he walked up the stairs, he saw Sirius glare at him and whisper harshly, "What the bloody Hell-?"

"I'm working on it!" Remus hissed over him. Sirius glared at Remus for a moment longer, then walked downstairs to give them some privacy, in case someone (Probably Tonks) decided to get vocal.

Remus reached Tonk's room, and knocked softly.

"Sirius?" Came a feeble voice.

With a gulp he replied, "No. This is Remus,"

He heard her huff and walk away from the door, "Wait, Dora! Please open the door,"

"Why? Mention to me for the hundredth time that you don't want me?" She sounded as if she was on the other side of the room, on her bed.

Remus was silent a moment, "I—I was going to ask if—if you wanted—I mean only if you want to—to go…out to dinner with me tonight?"

Remus didn't hear any movement from inside the room. Possible scenarios of what she could be doing were zooming in his mind, causing a migraine to start. Gosh, he hoped she just… just did something.

And she did. After a while, Remus heard sounds of her walking (and slightly tripping) her way over to the door. For a moment, she and Remus stood only a few inches away from each other, with only the 2 inch thick black door blocking them. Then she opened the door.

It swung inward, so Remus didn't have to step back. He stood there looking at her with slightly hopeful eyes. She looked highly skeptical, but when she opened her mouth to speak, her face expression turned to one of mild amusement.

"Really?" She asked with her eyes slightly narrowed.

He didn't know what to say in fear or upsetting her, so he nodded briskly.

She didn't smile, but it looked like she was containing one. Remus guessed she wasn't trying to kid herself. He felt bad that she felt that way.

"Alright then, how about tonight at eight?"

"Great!" He said, a little too enthusiastically. She smiled sadly at him, as if not to believe that he had actually asked if she wanted to go out with him.

Tonks closed the door and stared at it for a little while. Did…did that actually happen? Did he actually ask her to dinner.

She ran her hand through her unnatural brown hair and walked over to the bathroom. She looked at herself through the mirror. She wanted to believe that he truly liked her and wanted to be with her, but she couldn't wrap her mind around the thought that Remus just asked if she wanted to go on a date without a helpful push from Sirius.

Then she thought that she was over thinking it. Maybe it wasn't a date. Maybe he just wanted to go out, and he couldn't go out with Sirius.

That thought made her fell even worse. Normally something like this would make her happy. Why wasn't it? Why didn't she look ecstatic? Her conscience wasn't telling her that it was real. Her subconscious told her that she was indeed over thinking it, and why would someone like him ever want to date her.

Sure she was pretty and clever and all, but maybe he wanted someone different. Someone… someone normal.

A tear rolled down her dark brown eyes. Why did she have to be a metamorphagus? Why couldn't she just be a normal, 24 year old woman who had a silly crush on a 35 year old man? Was it…was it that bad?

The age difference never bothered her before. And it still doesn't. She shook all thoughts out of her head and headed over to her bed. If she was going on a date with Remus Lupin, then by God she was going to make it count—whether _he_ wanted it too or not.

**Hope you liked, R&R :)**


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